Rambles & Shambles

Eight days to go. It feels as if I've done all the packing I have to do, and yet when I look about this room, it's still a cluttered mess of junk, boxes, suitcases, CDs and crap. Odd, that. Just recovered from a rather unpleasant two-day tummy-bug-food-poisoning thingy which put me out of commission for a good... um... two days... but I'm happy to say it's all better now, not that anybody really needed to know about it. Haha! Have been feeling rather lethargic lately... dunno why... I guess it's just that I need something new to move on to, which is why I'm really anticipating this move back home as the start of something exciting to sink my teeth into; but at the same time there's a sense of dread and nervousness, y'know? I mean, what if I fall into the routine of work, family and minor socialising to the extent that I never pull myself out of it and never reach the ambitions that I've set myself? I suppose the trick is to keep working towards achieving these goals and not to be complacent, and to never lose sight of the bigger goal. I fear that life in Malaysia may become so routine and uninspiring that I'd wind up like I (somewhat ironically) have become now: jaded, cynical, unmotivated to do more, perpetually tired, binge eating and apathetic of it all. Maybe if and when and if that happens back home, it's a sign for me to move on to the next chapter, wherever that might be. Scary huh. Anyways, just thought I'd ramble on a bit since I felt I needed to vent. Have gained 8 kilos since the start of the year... so much for my hard work and dieting during the 2004-2005 season. Ah well. We'll start afresh back home. God willing. Bye for now.